Wedding Etiquette Tips on divorced parents, dealing with difficult situations in your wedding.

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Wedding Etiquette Tips 8


On Bride's father and divorced parents
The Bride’s Father
The bride’s father main duty is to give the daughter away during the wedding ceremony. And of course, he too has the privilege to foot the bill of the whole wedding event.

It is not new to know that a wedding can cost up to a full year’s wage at today’s standards. So I would like to advise wedding couples to help the father in unloading some burdens by covering up or contribute to some wedding expenses incurred. Perhaps even a little help from the bridegroom’s parents can mean a lot to him. You will be amaze to find out that your dad have been saving up for your wedding budget since you were very young!

Father of the bride should be wearing a similar suit with the Groom and the Best Man. If the father of the bride is unable to attend the wedding in any way, the bride’s uncle or brother will have to take the place in "giving the bride away" during the wedding ceremony. It will also be appropriate for the mother of the bride to give away her daughter if the bride so agrees to it.

The bride’s father will escort her from home to the venue of the wedding ceremony. When they arrive at the appointed time, all guests must be present. It will be proper to keep it to the time as scheduled, as you don’t want to keep everyone waiting at the wedding ceremony venue.

When all guests have entered into the building at the wedding planner’s cue (can be the best man or helpers), the bride’s father will hold her daughter at her right arm and walk in at a proper time. He will then hand his daughter to the clergyman as a gesture of "giving away". The bride’s father will accompany the groom’s mother into the vestry after the service and will witness the rest of the wedding ceremony. Right after the whole wedding ceremony is finished, the parent’s will rush to the wedding reception to play host and hostess to the guests, greeting them and making them feel at home.

Last but not least, during the wedding banquet or reception, the best man will ask the bride’s father to propose a toast to the newly weds, bride and groom.

Divorced Parents
As a wedding planner myself, the situation of a divorced parents will always arise and there tends to be some tension in the handling of things. The bride’s mother may not be too happy to share the same table as her ex-husband’s wife or even disapprove of the idea that her step-mother will be sitting at the front pew. It may even be that the bride’s divorced father is now having a new family and new commitments, his new wife will not approve of him paying the bills of the wedding; or because of new commitments it will be difficult to settle the wedding completely. Both the step-father and the natural father may be hurt even over the issue of ‘who is giving away the daughter?’

Above all the arguments that has been listed above, the most important thing to remember is that the wedding is to bless the Bride and Bridegroom, it is important that they themselves are happy and be blessed, which is the ultimate aim of the whole wedding.

Which all means that both sets of divorced parents should put up with each other’s disagreements. The step-mother should understand her husband’s feelings that the bride is still her daughter and very dear to him, paying for the wedding is the least he can do to show his love for her daughter. And the step-mother should never wear anything that over-shadow the bride’s mother by wearing more elaborate or stylish gown than hers. Things will work out well if everyone understands each other’s feelings and start working towards the success of the wedding. If too much concern is over the ‘giving away’, then it will be appropriate for both fathers to 'give away'. The bride’s mother may also be a good choice to fill in the place, if both father’s do not agree to the former.


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